Kochappan; literally.

He was talking over phone to someone. I waited till he finished.

"Let's go up and sit in the balcony''. While climbing the stairs he left an instruction, '' Don't disturb us unless it is urgent''.

"You were in a mood of retrospection the other day. Got over it?'' he had a nurturing smile.

'' Yes. Those days in Bombay, struggle to get a job, the sight of the richest, the vulgar splendour of their money, and the likes of those kids I saw at the rly way station, all had made me feel dejected then. Yes I was in such a mood that day. ''

" Suburban railway is a part and parcel of the life of a Mumbaikar, is it not ?'' he asked.

'' Yes it is. Your mention about the trains brings to my memory two other instances which are hard to forget.''

'' Are they also those which touched you?'' he enquired.

''Yes, in away. Yes. In both instances it was to do with saving the life of two people; nothing heroic. Still,'' I said.

He was ready to listen. I went back to sometime in1976.

'' From Goregaon rly station there was a narrow pathway along the railway track which can take one to the main road. It was very narrow and dangerously close to the track. Lot of commuters used to walk through that path to reach the road easily. I used to be one among them.''

Kochappan's wife walked in with two cups of tea; left it on the table and left, quietly.

I continued, ''That day in the evening after alighting from the train, I was walking through that path, when I saw a man about 30-40 feet ahead of me dangerously close to the track, unaware
of a train approaching us from behind in the same direction. I made a sound; I don't know whether I yelled, shrieked, or howled at him to move out. May be it was act of sheer reflex, he jumped to the side. He had tryst with destiny. He made it in time. He was the winner. Lot of people who were in the scene, walking along abused him for his carelessness. I patted him on his shoulder and walked off.''

''Which is the other instance?'' Kochappan wanted to know.

'' Santacruz station on a Sunday night. Not very crowded. I was returing to Goregaon. The train
had started coming in to the platform. I heard voices shouting from behind me. I looked back and saw two people pointing to a girl clad in saree, standing in front of me at the edge of the platform. The train was coming in, but a bit away. She didn't move or make any effort to do so. Since she was closer to me I called out to her to warn her about the approaching train. She heard me, but stood motionless. I felt something fishy; her neglecting my call. Now the train was coming closer. I ran to her, caught her elbows from behind and pulled her backwards towards me. She was lean and I managed to pull her back.T he train stopped at the station as it does. I jumped into that train itself which I was to board. She was still standing in the platform. There was no expression on her face; she was blank.'' I stopped.

'' Touchy incidents. Aren't they?'' He commented; in the form of a question.

'' The second instance was also touchy but less emotional. I walked off to the main road at Goregaon. Probably after about 5 minutes somebody touched my shoulder from behind.It was that man from the pathway near the rly track. He extended something to me and said
'' Mere paas iske alava aap ko dene ke liye kuch nahi hai''. I looked at it. It was a Parry's toffee
(the ones available those days which had green coloured wrapper) which would have cost him 25 ps those days. What the third one gave me was blank look;a very blank look.''

Kochappan had a smile when he said this to me. ''All the three incidents were touchy literally and figuratively. The first two came and touched you and you went and touched the third one;
the girl.''

Only one conversation I can remember I have had with Kochappan without taking a lesson in English was the one I had with him the other day. I thought this day would be another. I was proven wrong.

'' Your saying he made it 'in time' to move out off the track is not the apt usage. It should be he made it 'on time' because he made it at the nick of the moment and not little early as 'in time' suggests.''

With a mischievous smile he asked me the last question on those incidents.

'' Tell me Aniyan, frankly. Literally was that girl in saree good figuratively?''

Let me tell the truth. Kochappan confuses me a lot; I am telling you the truth he does that literally every time !!!

menon ( aniyan )

The scars that remain.

''It was around 11.30 at night. There were very few people on the station platform. That is a very rare sight in any platform of a suburban rly station of Bombay. 'Bombay' because this was in 1975''.

I stopped and looked at him. kochappan was listening; that's the impression I got.

I continued speaking. It was not speaking. It was recollection of memories; on a damp evening in the balcony of his apartment. There was silence in the air; nothing depressing though.

''I was standing somewhere in the middle of the platform. The frequency of trains is low at that time. I felt a the touch of a hand almost at me knee. I looked down and saw a small boy; or was it a girl; long hair in tangles wearing a cloth which could be a shirt or a frock (I don't recollect what it was). It reached, let me say to his knees. The look in his face was not of hunger. It was a look of desperation. I fished in my pocket and a got a coin and extended it to him. My salary was Rs.200/, those days, less provident fund and ESIC; on hand around 140/. I was depressed and looking for a job with subsistance level salary. I took out another coin and offered. He, without accepting it, pointed towards the small tea stall in the platform. It was an expression of desparation out of hunger.''

I paused and took a sip of water.

Kochappan was now listening with rapt attention. I could see it in his face. There was silence.
I continued.

"I walked towards the stall. He followed me. I bought two pieces of 'paav', local term for small thing like 'bun'. I gave it to him. He, instead of eating it, walked with it to a spot near the foot overbridge nearby. I was watching him. Then I noticed another kid lying on a fragment of what could have been once a sheet. He bent and touched that kid. He, or may be she, moved a little. This boy helped the kid to sit up. He also sat near the one whom he woke up and gave that piece of food which I gave to him. He fed him piece by piece. The one who woke up ate with half closed eyes.''

I paused for few seconds and continued.

''Saab kya dekh rahe ho? Gaadi aa rahi hai. Javoge ya nahi?'' the booth owner who was watching me reminded me. Not many customers. He also didn't have anything to do!

''Nahi, mai agle gaadi se javoonga. Whose kids are they?'' I asked the stall owner without taking my eyes away from the kids.

'' God knows sir, they have been here for the last few days,'' he answered disinterested.

I bought two more pieces of 'paav' and two 'batata vada' and walked towards those kids. Both looked up at me. I gave the paav and vada to him, the one who came to me first. They continued eating and I walked away.

I was sitting on a bench waiting for the next train. I felt a touch and looked. It was that kid.
Suddenly he bent and touched my feet and looked at me. And then he walked away. His legs carrying that tiny frame moved away from me. I sat lost. I felt a lump in my throat. The train was moving in. I shuffled and started gettingup......

The rude sound of the calling bell interrupted us. Kochappan's wife called up and wanted him to go down to meet some guest who had come in. Kochapps looked at me. His eyes told me that he wanted to listen to me. The conversation had to stop for the day.

"Aniyan,'' he paused; then asked me, ''Is it something which really happened?''

'' Yes. It is'' I replied.

I said 'hello' to his guests and walked out.

From behind He called up, '' Will you come tomorrow? You must.'' He wanted to continue.
''I will, definitely. I will be here by 9 at night''

I felt relieved. It was like unloading a burden which I have been carrying for years. The burden of the look in the eyes of that kid; the burden of the sight of those slender legs carrying that frail frame carrying the 'paav' to feed his brother lying in ragged piece of cloth; that burden of seeing the half closed eyes of the kid trying to eat that small piece of bun.

I will come back tommorow. Sit with him and speak. You feel so great that you have people, like him and few more with whom you can unwind; share the agonies of the moments you have gone through, the moments which have touched you.

I started walking back home .... Wounds may heal, but the scars remain.



menon ( aniyan)

Worst spell of bowling , Sreesanth and Kochappan

I was at the wheel. We were nearing Alwaye. It would take another half an hour to reach the airport.

"The flight is on time. I want to be there when it lands,'' said Kochappan.

Hold on. You might be wondering what is Kochappan doing at Kochi. He flew in day before yesterday to receive Sreesanth returning after the Twenty20 match; hence the trip to airport.

'' Hurry, or else I will miss the boat'' quoth Kochapps in OE. I did not, as usual, understand the afore mentioned reference to 'missing the boat' when one is proceeding to the airport.

I sought clarification with reluctance. He gave me a look; something similar to what Dhoni gave to Sreesanth, who in a benevelent mood, gave twenty runs in his first over.

'' To miss the boat in figurative language means to miss the excitement'', he explained. Figurative language? but I didn't proceed further.

Soon as we reached the airport. Kochappan took off, like Carl Lewis, to the terminal. The airport was a sea of humanity. We stood and watched the frenzy of people. I could see Sree accompanied by three people coming out.

'' The one on the left is Mathew Varghese, ex-captain of Kerala Ranji team'', said Kochappan.

'' I know'' said I. '' I have seen this former captain's photograph in newspapers'' I added. Iam not good in Arithmetics", still I added vehementally.

'' He is not the former captain. He is the ex-captain,'' came kochapps.

'' That's what I also said'' I retorted.

'' There is a difference . Rahul Dravid was the captain of Indian team; so was Sourav Ganguly.
when you refer to Rahul you should mention him as ex-captain because he was the immediate past captain. But Saurav and Tendulkar are former captains because they preceded Rahul.
Abdul Kalam is the ex-president of India whereas Dr.Radhakrishnan and Zakir Hussain are former presidents of India, '' Kochappan stopped. I looked at him with reverance; the variety with which people were looking at Sreesanth.

Seeing an oppurtunity to get close to Sreesanth I hurried up to him. He recogonised me and we talked. He has not forgotten his old college mate. I was elated. I looked at Kochappan from the corner of my eye. Kochappan was standing with his jaws fallen; on seeing me talking to Sree.
I reminded to collect his fallen jaw and to restore it it's ex- postion and not the former position.
Last time he did it himself.

'' Why didn't you tell me that you knew him earlier,'' asked Kochappan in a hurt tone. his jaw may have been aching.

I kept silence. Very rarely do I keep it with me. This time I did.

'' What did you two speak ?'' he was curious. I felt bad that I did not tell him about my friendship with Sree. I apologised. He accepted.

'' We remembered our old days to gether and I also mentioned about his bad spell of bowling in the last over," I replied.

'' You shouldnot have done that today,'' Kochapps opined

'' He has always had this problem even when he was in school,'' I opened the history book.

'' Our English teacher was our Cricket coach also. Whenever he had asked Sree to spell 'Bowling' Sree used to spell it 'boulin'. The master then used to say that that is the worst spell of 'bowling' he has had from any body.'' I closed the history book.

Kochappan jerked , twisted and convulsed in his seat. Then there was silence. I could listen to it.
I dropped him at his home and these were his parting words.

'' Aniyan, you are a humble man but you have nothing in you to be otherwise''

I didnot quite get it. He was probably upset about my mention about the worst spell of bowling to Sreesanth!

I will ask him tommorow.

menon ( aniyan )

Kochappan, achu mama,and cabbages

Dr.S.B.Misra, who gave up his career as a geologist in North America to return to India to fulfill his dream of building a 'village school' in Lucknow, was in for a surprise when he saw an e-mail in his inbox. It informed him of a rare honour of a 565 million year old 'Fossil' being named after him by the Govt of Canada. His discovery, the oldest record of multicellular life on earth, is now called 'Fractofusus Misrai'.

I do not know whether you can picturise the expression of surprise and excitement of a UP-born Misra at that time. Probably, if the regional prejudices cloud your vision, I can recommend
your imagining the south Indian face of Kochappan showing the same excitement in seeing a
fe-male instead of an e-mail in his office when he reaches there. E-mails rarely excite him; for you and me the difference in one alphabet would be another mistake in spelling, but for Kochapps, it's different; like the advertisement of Maggie hot and sour tomato ketchup; it's different.

May I remind you at this juncture that I have not met Kochapps for almost a month. We had a lot to discuss, from 123 Agreement to the reforms in administration of 'Achu mama', the CM of Kerala.

'' Achu mama is very innovative and is doing lot of good for the state in particular, and for the country in general. Achumama is a patriot. He contributes to India with all his might from Thiruvanantapuram.'' I observed without prejudice.

'' Can you give me one example ?'' asked Kochapps in a sarcastic tone.

'' I can site an example of his innovativeness'' I volunteered. Normally I don't volunteer but for Achu mama I did.

''The city streets are choking because of the increase in number of vehicles, resulting in traffic jam. Achu mama has come out with an innovative idea to overcome this problem, '' I said with pride and added a little dignity also to it ; like lime to Gin or Coke to rum.

''Tell me more'', sarcasm in tone had not left Kochapps fully.

'' No cars will be allowed to ply in the cities without filling it's full seating capacity and two wheelers should necessarily have a pillion rider also''. I gave the overall picture.

Kochappan's jaws fell .You may have seen a mango or coconut falling from their respective trees but you may not have seen ' jaws' falling. Kochappan's jaws fell. Picturise it please.

He collected his fallen jaw back (the lower one), reinstated it and asked '' Does it mean that I cannot go out in a car if only I and my wife are going out.? Does it mean that I have to collect another two people to fill up the seating capacity? I have heard of the idea of car sharing being encouraged but what is this all about?''

'' This rule gives rise to generation of additional employment these days '' I informed.

'' Additional employment opportunity ?'' He was at loss; his 'Balance Sheet' was affected very badly.

'' Assume a situation when only you and your wife are there to go by car for shopping, outing or for a quiet drive. You can ring up agencies (which will be set up) who will provide you people on hire to be your co-passengers.You can specify sex, age, height, weight, complexion etc to your taste and choose them. This generates lot of employment. This will be so for two wheeler owners also. Brilliant and innovative idea!'' I commented.

Kochappan slumped. These days he is unable to understand harsh realities of life. He needs help to move to his bedroom. He felt dizzy. Achu mama's innovative ideas have left him dazed.

I covered him with a sheet up to his chest and bid good bye for the day and then he spoke.

'' You told me about fossils. Your Achu mama and most of the politicians who govern us are fossils. Do you know where they should be?''. Before I could think of an answer he said it.

''They are useless on the top of the ground. They should be underneath; inspiring cabbages ''

I knew that the likes of Achumama can inspire lot of people but till Kochapps said it I didn't know that they can inspire even cabbages !!!

menon ( aniyan)

Mere Desh Ki Dharthi

The morning was grey. Clouds gathered in the distant sky. It was getting dark. The wind was damp. It was eerie.

'' Something ominous is going to happen'' murmured some. ''Something bad for the country'', said a few others. I didn't want to sit alone. I rang up kochapps and told him that I want solace. I do not know whether you have taken solace from friends; it’s good; esp the variety kochapps dishes out; it's very good, try it sometime.

When I reached Kochapps' apartment block half an hour later, I found a crowd of the residents of the flats near the 'Club House Hall'. I passed through gloomy faces into the hall to locate Kochapps. Some women were huddled together and were whispering. Some had eyes red, out of crying. I found Kochapps with difficulty. He was not affected much.
I asked him, '' what happened?''

''Don't you know what happened.?''

'' No'' .quoth I ; in Old English; the British variety.

'' Behold'' quoth he also, in OE, and extended the paper to me.

' Sanjay Dutt sentenced to six years imprisonment'' was the head line.

'' I knew this alright but what is happening here'' I enquired.

'' The Hindi film lovers including the north Indians from this building are meeting to protest and to pray for Sanjay. They are also requesting the Film Actors Assn
' AMMA" to declare 'Hartal' in Kerala.

After the meeting I read out the reports to Kochapps, like I did on the Churidar Issue of Guruvayoor.

'' Was there a rally after Sanjay was arrested.?'' I asked ; innocently.

'' What rally?'' he asked.

" This report says, “The film personalities rallied behind actor Sanjay Dutt after he was arrested on Tuesday”. I stopped for clarification.

He gave me a look I won't forget in my life.

I read the reactions of people from various walks of life to this incident.

'' Victim of conspiracy of circumstances'', said Shatrughnan Sinha, BJP MP.
"Iska badla hum zaroor loonga'', he pledged ; ever since he was sworn in as an
MP, he is in this habit of making 'pledges' ; ordinary statements are few and rare.

'' Upsetting'', director Kunal Kohli said, '' My sympathy is with his family .... It is a very sad day for Bharath desh. He has already paid for what he has done''. The patriot Kunal is, he recited two lines from manoj kumar's 'UPKAR'

'' Mere desh ki dharti sonaha ugle, ugle he heere mothi,
Mere desh ki dharti, Mere desh ki dharti, Mere desh ki dharti'', repeated it thrice to prove the point.

His voiced choked with emotion for Bharathdesh and Sanjay. He couldn't continue. He retired hurt. Like Manoj Kumar from patriotic films.

“Had he paid any fine earlier? '' I sought clarification again. Kochapps looked at me. To be very frank I couldn't decipher his expression. It was not an encouraging one anyway.

Film maker Anubhav Sinha hoped that '' there would be some provisions in the judgement to find some relief for our friend''. Mahesh Bhatt also mentioned about this 'relief in judgement.'

'' If the judgement doesn't have any relief to Sanjay, the Bollywood film Industry should definitely seek the help of the Drugs and Pharmaceutical Industry to provide some relief not only to him but to his family members in pain'' I expressed my opinion openly.

The last response came from the notable Bollywood film actress Monica Bedi who is convalescing after serving a term in jail for two separate charges of 'Physical alliance with mutiple people in a compromising manner in a discotheque in Delhi ' and ' Passport forgery case'. From her ancestral home from Chhabewal, in Hoshiarpur district. she said '' It's a big loss''.

She expressed her hope,'' Like Phoenix rose from ashes I have come back to life so will Sanjay'' .

I finished reading.

As if to Sanjay, I said it aloud ''You will come out like the phoenix from ashes, Sanjay, making it three of us achieving that feat; Monica from Hoshiarpur, you from Mumbai and I from Ravipuram.!!!”

I looked at Kochappan. He was fast asleep unmindful of the national calamities happening. I closed the door gently and waked on to the road.

It was still cloudy; threatening to rain.......

menon ( aniyan )

Hindustan Latex

That news came around 6.30pm on TV. We were in a restaurant at that time.
It came as surprise. It was breaking a tradition of so many years. It was about the decision of the Devaswom committee of Guruvayoor temple to allow women to enter temple wearing 'Churidar- kurta'.

'' What is so great about this news? why are people excited? Were women not allowed to wear anything while entering Guruvayoor, that Churidar news is being welcomed? were the questions I asked Kochappan who was having the third peg of Gin ; large one ; the 60ml variety. I was on lime, and cordial to him.

Wait till you see tomorrow's news papers. I assured him of excitement tomorrow.

At 10.30am next day. I read the newspapers loud to him in his room.

'' A novel decision'' was Chief Minister Achummavan's response.

'' Chief Minister is insulting this decision by calling novel , fiction etc it should be appreciated'' came the comment of opposition leader Ommen chandy. ''He doesn't have the guts to takea decision like this'' he added ; Chandy was good in arithmetics in school.

'' What is this issue about ' novel', ' fiction.? I asked kochapps.

'' It's a question of infuence of literacy and in Kerala politicians dont fight but engage in war of words.'' he replied

'' I want to have gin now before lunch'' he told me. I told him that I shall have lime with the same cordiality.

'' This decision to allow Churidar- kurta is to help the Ready made garment mafia of Mumbai and Tiruppur to increase their business in Kerala''. Alleged BJP state president krishna das. Krishna Das 'alleges' every day after bath and breakfast; it's just a habit.

The Chavakkad and Guruvayoor chapter of the ' Nudist's Association of Kerala'
has appealed to co-nudists from Goa to join their protest against the Devaswom board.
'' Considering Lord Krishna's focus and the specific interest in hiding the clothes of 'Gopikas' when they were taking their bath in the river and allied activities, allowing female devotees in Guruvayoor temple in their birth- day -suites would be the ideal way of worship '' claimed Ragunath Krishnan, the 70 yr old former president of the Nudist's chapter of Chavakkad and Guruvayoor. He exhorted the younger members to press for their demand for the implementation of birthday-suites concept in all Sree Krishna Temples in Kerala.

I looked at Kochapps. He was lost in thought ; then he said '' In an interview a press correspondent asked Dr.Kurien, founder of NDDB , as to what was wrong with Kerala. Do you know the reply he is reported to have given ?''

'' No, I don't''.

' The only thing wrong about kerala is that it is full of Malayalees''

Kochappan being educated and scholarly I requested him for his comment.

'' I have only one request to the politicians of this state'' he said.

'' What would that be?''

'' Please learn from your parent's mistakes. Use birth controls and if you love your state as you say buy the 'Hindustan Latex' ones made in Kerala'' !!!

As it happens to me most of the times I was wondering why should they use birth controls for their parents' mistakes.


menon ( aniyan )

Global Warming

' You Live Only Twice' ; ' Once when you are born and then when you
' face death'.

I have not experienced it when I was born. But after I was born, seeing the kind of person Iam,and my life after my birth, there was a general opinion among the friends of my parent's that, the gene pool of the family should make use of little Chlorine so that the further outputs of their's , would be more clean, neat and acceptable to the society at large.

Madam du Barry, mistress of Louis xiv , facing death, just before being Guillotined, pleaded '' You are going to hurt me.Please don't hurt me. Just one more moment.I beg you, please.'' She was living that moment ,as she has never lived before.

That was one approach to facing death.

'' How about this for a head line for a tomorrow's newspaper.' French Fries' '' .said James French before being executed in electric chair in 1966.

That was another.

and the third one. ''I would like to thank my family for loving me and taking care of me.And the rest of the world can kiss my ass'' .James Frank Garret Sr injected to death 1992.

Why-these- unpleasant things- now question would have crossed your mind.

Iam on my way to Kochappan to get response about my recent writing on fantasy of going to Ravipuram cremation ground which was preceeded by the ones on 'Cats', 'Godots', 'Dogs' etc.

Of the three options available and mentioned above, I chose the Madam du Barry approach to facing execution from Kochappan ; the ' plead for the mercy ' variety.

Keeping in line with the recent trend of recreating old incidents like 'Dandi March'
I decided to resort to the same style ; One has to be up- to- date , you know.
Like Madam Barry I started walking towards Kochapp's house 7 kms away.

I have bought the' thigh of a lamb' from Kaloor market, an area of the anatomy in which I dwell considerably when eating it. But I have never seen the face of a lamb in front of it's executioner. Probably it would have been something like Madam Barry's when she was in the same state as the lamb was.

Contrary to my expectations of being extinguished nothing bad happened ; I and Rahul Dravid were in the same boat ; better still, similar boat', because his was in Lord's and mine was in India ; geographical difference you see.

'' Aniyan you have improved quite bit in your writing .Now that your readers are satisfied and has had their hearts full you should take up spoken English and write less'' Kochapps nurtured.

I sat like the Pomeranian breed; enjoying it. Great moments of life;being nurtured ;not tortured as Madam du Barry.

Iam taking up spoken English seriously because I have decided to go more into Training and teaching in various institutes like the ones of Guru's management.

'' You can learn and improve a lot with a person like Raj of Guru'' Kochappan opined.

'' I have started using better and professional English in his organisation.I have learned and started using lot of phrases , idioms etc'' I said proudly.

'' That's good I know you can do it.Is Raj happy!''. Kochapps' expectation about me was growing.

'' Oh yes. I was also there with him when he was entertaining two of his clients from a management consultancy from Britain at Windsor Manor at lunch''. I paused.

'' You would have contributed to the conversation '' he was in conjecture.

'' Oh yes I did. Using new found phrases I engaged the British couple.To please the lady and complement her I said ' If I had told you that you have a gorgeous body will you hold it against me?' .

Kochappan froze. '' Did the man hear it'' .

'' No he was in conversation with Raj''. I said. '' I proved to the Brit that I had knowledge about Britain by giving a quote about England''

'' What did you say''

'' I told him '' I know why the sun never sets on British Empire.Because even God will not trust an Englishman in darkness''

'' Oh God. How did he react'' Kochapps moaned.

'' He had a similar expression like yours '' I said ; innocentally

" How did Raj react?''

'' He got me ticket by 'Go Air' to Kochi from the hotel travel desk itself on credit card, and drove me to the airport. Even in that cold climate he was sweating. May be he was feeling bad about my leaving Bangalore''. I finished giving feed back.

Kochappan tried to stand up. He swayed. This is the second time I have seen him going weak on his knees after a conversation with me. I helped him to the bed room. He was sweating like Raj did after lunch. '' Why are all of you sweating?'' I asked him.

'' Global warming, Aniyan , Global warming'' he muttered !!!!

Carbon Dioxide and Nitrous Oxide are cited as causes for Global warming.

I did not quite understand what did I have to do with Global warming !!!

I will have to ask him.

menon ( aniyan )